How do you respond to past hurts and disappointments in your life? Do you pull yourself up by the bootstrap and move forward or do you simply back down and say if it wasn’t for this or that I would have a better life? Blaming others is like a disease it’s like an escape route; it’s a way to not take responsibility for your own lack of success.
Merriam-Webster defines blame as to hold responsible; to place responsibility. The definition clearly shows you that you are not taking responsibility for your own actions; you are choosing to place the responsibility of your own success or failure on someone else.
Placing blame will never give you success or the future you desire it will only keep you in a place of resentment and unforgiveness. There are so many people who find it far too easy to blame their failures on their childhood, parents, friends, spouses, coworkers, their supervisors, but no one has the greatest power of influence over your life than you do.
I ran across training from Craig Holiday titled, ‘Why Not You?’ He explains that it does not matter whether you came from an abusive home or a place of poverty, there is no excuse for you not being the successful and driven person that you desire to be. Instead of focusing on why you should not be all that you can, he causes you to focus on why it should be you.
Everyone can pick something in our lives that could make us cringe if we gave much thought to it. We all have an excuse that we can fall upon as to why we shouldn’t be successful or as to why things could not possibly work for us, but it is better to focus on the reasons why we can make it than not.
The only thing that blaming others will give you is a life of bitterness, regret, and misery. You cannot and will not be able to move on successfully with these ugly leeches in your life. Anyone can choose to be bitter, but should choose to be better.
The moment you choose to let it all go that is the moment your life will heal; it is not an overnight thing. If you have been blaming others and refusing to let the past be the past for years, you will have to work hard to renew your mind and cleanse yourself of ill-thoughts.
In my own life I have found that you have to renew your mind with new thoughts repeatedly to see results. Instead of giving in to those old thoughts of sadness, regrets, and unforgiveness, repeat, ‘I am happy,’ ‘I am successful,” I forgive (place said person’s name here) or ‘I Love (place said person’s name here).’ It’s not an overnight thing, but if you put forth the effort to renew your mind and stop blaming others daily and take control of your destiny your life will be forever changed.